Sunday, January 15, 2006

happy birthday Dr. KING.

a good site to visit is www.Tolerance.org


my grandparents on my mother's side were italian americans.
my grandfather came to this country when he was 15, all alone.
he spent a year on the railroad and 50 in a steel mill. he and my
grandmother raised 4 fine children, 2 spent time in the service, one
in world war 2 as a navigator on a bomber. my grandfather was so
proud of becoming a citizen. he knew far more of this county's
history than i did and we made trips as a family to washington d.c.
mt. vernon and monticello, gettysburg and other historical places
because my grandfather wanted to see them, walk them, absorb them.
when he passed away in his mid 80's the whole town, it seemed,
turned out. everyone had stories to tell me of things that
my grandfather did for them over the years. things i never knew about,
kindnesses big and small that he never mentioned because they
were just the right things to do, a kindness is done for the sake of kindness
not for future gain or to keep score. my grandfather was an amazing
person.

the point, well, my grandparents moved from the small town they
had settled in to the next town up the road, considered a more affluent one
trying to make a nicer home for their small children. they were
one of the first few italians to move there and the people that
owned the home next to the one they bought had 7 locks installed
on their big wooden front door and slept with a gun by the bed.
the wops were next door you understand. they were "moving on up!"

how do i know this? because that lady and her husband and my grandparents
became good friends over the years and they told my grandparents
of the fears and false impressions, the prejudices they had.
i wonder tho, did getting to know my grandparents show this couple
(who were older than my grandparents by a good deal) that some things
they believed, that prejudices weren't right or did they think that well,
"that family of wops" was alright, the exception to the rule?

i will never know. my grandfather didn't say much about such things. he went
about the business of living and ended up teaching by example.
i miss him. he taught me to take people as they come, as individuals. i hope
i make him proud, i know he still watches over me.

so, happy birthday Dr. King
i think you were a fine man too.

7 comments:

Charlie Tee said...

...And you are a fine woman, I'm proud to call you friend and sister. Your Grandpa's genes are inherent in your goodness.God bless you always.
By the way, congrats to your team.
I love you,Tee

Charlie Tee said...

PS. about Jeff Healey, the band still performs at small venues around the country. Mostly in the New York City area at places like the Knitting Factory.Tee

Christopher T. George said...

Hi Sherry

I enjoyed reading about your grandparents. Quite a story about the neighbors with shotgun and the seven locks! Your contemplation of whether the neighbors changed their bigoted views is interesting and worthwhile.

Chris

Sherry Pasquarello said...

hi charlie, you are too kind. thank you. my grandfather was not a perfect man, but he was a very special person that kept learning and growing as a human being. he taught me a lot without ever letting me know that he was teaching.

hiya george, i tried to leave a comment earlier, on your blog, but it never registered, gremlins i say!! ha!
i'm glad you enjoyed the tale. it became clear to me from an early age that if people as kind and as hard working as my grandparents were discriminated against and called names, or even just quietly thought less of because of being italian american, then it just follows that prejudice as a whole is not only wrong but illogical and hurtful to everyone involved including the hater.
believe me, if i do not care for a specific person, it has nothing to do with race or religion or orientation, it's just a dislike of that one specific person.it would never be for a dumb reason as prejudice.
there aren't many i really dislike thankfully and those few, i avoid.
i like most everyone i meet.

p.s. to charlie, i'm glad that band is still playing. i always thought they were very good!

zoe kentucky said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
zoe kentucky said...

Reminds me of stories my mom told me when she was growing up in Bloomfield. Her Irish Protestant grandfather spent a lot of time complaining about the wops and "the Mickeys." (The Catholics.) She grew up wearing Protestant orange on St. Patrick's Day, never green, green was what Catholics wore and it was verboten. I still have a whole branch of my of my extended Irish Pittsburgh family that are fulfilling one of the Irish archetypes-- they're all cops. (My parents still live in Pittsburgh, as do my grandmother and aunt.)

By the by, I currently live in DC but I'm moving back to the 'burgh this year. It's been 15 years away...I can't wait!

Sherry Pasquarello said...

hi zoe, my late in-laws had family in bloomfield, pearl st. i think.

yeah, pgh still has it's little ethnic neighborhood or few blocks of this and that, changing tho, with each new group of immigrants. i think that's a good thing. me, i see wonderful opportunities for learning.

no one in my immediate family married another italian except me. have english and german and irish american aunts. that was a big deal back then, not now. so i am used to seeing the crap that some people went through to be with the one they fell in love with. my irish aunt actually (gasp) converted to catholic! a fact i did not learn til i was an adult so i also know first hand how much religion can play a part in giving grief for no good reason or helping beyond what i thought it could. i hope you come back to the burgh. we need people here! go steelers!!!!