Tuesday, January 31, 2006

" We who lived in the concentration camps
can remember the men who walked through
the huts comforting others, giving away their
last piece of bread. They may have been few in number,
but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be
taken from a man but one thing: the last of his
freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set
of circumstances."

Viktor E. Frankl

pittsburgh snow


grey snowflakes
like cold ashes
angle sideways


stinging like a slap on
an already bruised cheek


a tarnished snow that
forces weary thoughts to
trudge emotional wastelands


wet branches against tin skies
shiver with the cold.
good bye Mrs. King. you lived your life with dignity and grace. i think in many ways your path was even harder than your husband's. rest well.

Saturday, January 28, 2006

i've been at those tests again!
i liked this result tho, thought it was pretty good.

i am a VISIONARY SOUL
a curious person, always in a state of awareness
connected to all things spiritual i am connected to my soul
wise, bright. able to reason and be reasonable
occasionally, get quite depressed
and have dark feelings.
have great vision and can be very insightful
i am often profound
in a way that surprises myself.
visionary souls like me can be the best type of friend.
i am(supposedly here, all this stuff is, supposedly!)
intuitive, understanding (til i'm not, me here)
sypmpathetic and a good healer!

i'm compatible with an old soul or a peacemaker soul!

ALRIGHTY THEN!!!! s
" The way to love anything is to realize it might be lost."

Gilbert Keith Chesterton
well

how am i to do it now
now, with this empty space
this place where your name
used to be. well?
what can i use up my days with?


can you give me a purpose
before you walk away,
a new creation for my dreams
a reason to feel anything
someone to pray for


don't tell me to pray for myself
it's much too late for that.


me, this is a work in progress.
i forgot to post that, dummy me!

i thought i'd post a working draft
then show how i will work on it from time
to time. tho, in truth, it might sit for
ages til i find out how it should go. s

Friday, January 27, 2006

blog things...


i am SUNSHINE (oh, THAT'S funny)


soothing and calm
you are often held up by others as the ideal
(oh that's even funnier!)

but too much of you and they'll get burned
(or i will!!!)


you are best known for your warmth

(they HAVE to be talking about my personality
and not my ledgendary blue toes or fingers!!! )


your dominant state: CONNECTING (with chicken jokes or ducks or KFC maybe!!!)
friday chicken jokes, chicken jokes, get your chicken jokes here!


which chicken is at the top of the pecking order?

ATTILA THE HEN!!!!


why did the rooster file for divorce?

HE WAS TIRED OF BEING HEN-PECKED!!!

Thursday, January 26, 2006

i was shown a photo album last night . as i turned the pages, seeing familiar but younger faces, smiling, long gone new years and birthdays and picnics, she said, "sherry do you realize that over 10 of the people in these pictures are dead now?"


did you know

as the camera flashed
that this would be
a last remembered bright smile
that a kissed cheek would
be the ending touch of
flesh and soul and possibilities
a life, captured beneath
a sheet of protective plastic
brought out every now and then.
back, the blogger maintenance is done.

bob update.

my little guy was much better about
getting into the cat carrier and going to
the vets this morning.
he's doing just fine. had the rest of his meds and shots.
he is scheduled to be neutered in april.after i opened
up the carrier at home he scooted under the bed,
but came back out after about a 10 minute sulk,
much faster on the forgiveness than his first trip
3 weeks ago. he has gained a pound and his vet is pleased
so am i! s

Monday, January 23, 2006

i had a lot of free time this week.
i promised myself i would sit down
and spend some serious time working
at this next poem.

i did, oh i beat my head against the wall
more than once and i kept looking for excuses
to get up from this computer, but bob was sleeping
on the couch, no one else was here so i had no choice
but to finish, submit it for critiques and comments
to my wonderful(bless em)workgroup,
rework a few parts after considering their suggestions.

the time invested paid off because the work was well received
by everyone. so i am posting it here.

be advised, it is adult in nature.(not strictly autobiographical, just a poem )
sometimes i actually act like the adult i'm supposed to be! ; )





i can not go there


i can not imagine myself as a man
with a man's lines and angles
larger bones and rough hands
narrowed hips walking a man's stride
owning the ground

i can not go there that alien land of
bigger shadows and deeper voices
even in dreams of power and easy laughter

i can not look at a woman
the way you look at me
with a quickened pulse and heated strength
grown between muscled thighs

oh but i can fuck you like a man
not with hardness but with intensity
and fierce purpose, a dominant female
with warm mouth and opened legs

i can imagine myself a woman
with a woman's curves and hollows
small bones and soft hands
round hips walking a woman's stride
owning a man.

Do Unto OthersThe Golden RuleAll over the world, there exists a simple precept that, when followed, has the power to end conflict and banish strife. It is the Golden Rule, a key concept in many philosophies and spiritualities that admonishes us to "do unto others as we would have them do unto us." Its meaning is clear: treat others only in ways that you would want to be treated. However, the golden rule is not always easy to follow. It can be a challenge to honor others as we wish to be honored. Yet, when we do so, we bestow a gift of loving kindness on our fellow human beings. And, in honoring others, we honor ourselves.It is as uncomplicated a tenet as one could wish for. When we live by it, harming another person becomes nearly impossible. The Golden Rule is rooted in pure empathy and does not compel us to perform any specific act. Rather, it gently guides us to never let our actions toward others be out of harmony with our own desires. The Golden Rule asks us to be aware of the effect our words and actions may have on another person and to imagine ourselves in their place. It calls on us to ask ourselves how we would feel if what we were about to do were directed toward us. And yet this rule invites us to do more than not harm others. It suggests that we look for opportunities to behave toward others in the same ways that we would want others to act toward us. Showing compassion, being considerate of others, caring for the less fortunate, and giving generously are what can result when you follow the Golden Rule.Adhering to the Golden Rule whenever possible can have a positive effect on the world around you because kindness begets kindness. In doing so, you generate a flow of positive energy that enfolds everyone you encounter in peace, goodwill, and harmony.


i get messages delivered everyday by the daily OM.
this was todays. i try to live this way. i fail, but i try. s

Sunday, January 22, 2006

WE won!!!!!!!
blog stuff, blog stuff, oh i've been at those tests again!

my stripper song is, CLOSER by nine inch nails.

" You let me violate you, you let me desecrate you
you let me penetrate you, you let me complicate you
help me i broke apart my insides, help me i've got
no soul to tell."

it also said, "when you dance it's a little scary- and a lot sexy."

now as to my dance style, i'll have to defer to those watching.

about this song, i have never heard it BUT the lyrics are
so like poetry that i wanted to post them. i'd edit it a bit
but really, good good words! s




go steelers!!!!!
HAPPY, HAPPY, BIRTHDAY! CHARLIE TEE!!!!!! enjoy this day, it's YOUR day! s

www.diffrentstrokes.blogspot.com

Saturday, January 21, 2006

THE MONSTER FROM GREEN HELL

is scheduled tonight on IT'S ALIVE!

10 p.m. ch. 21 where i'm at. oh the joy, the toe curling rapture!

Friday, January 20, 2006

oh hurry on over to tunesmith and anthony's blog!
www.tunesmith-anthony.com

anthony has a great clip of tom waits!

hey grant, if you read this, it's good! s
don't forget, the other blog that i am a part of is up and running.

www.thesoulofus.blogspot.com


you might have some thoughts on the 2 subjects we touched on
or perhaps you have a topic you'd like to talk about. s
friday, chicken joke time!!!

ah, i know, can't start your weekend without one!

why did the chicken cross the road???

" because the government had fooled the chicken
into thinking that she was crossing of her own free will,
when she was really only serving THEIR interests."

George Orwell

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Wilson Pickett has passed on.
that really sucks!

oh he was something!!!

in the midnight hour!
blog things/blog things, la la, blog things...


my personality profile,

" you are dependable, popular, and
observant.
deep and thoughtful, you are prone to moodiness.
in fact, your emotions tend to influence everything you do.

you are unique, creative, and expressive.
you don't mind waving your freak flag every
once in
a while.
and lucky for you, most people find your
weird ways charming." good thing they do, bless 'em!



your hidden talent

" you have a natural talent of rocking the boat,
thwarting the system.
and while this may not seem big, it can be.
it's people like you
who serve as the catalysts to
major cultural changes.
you're just a bit behind the scenes,
so no one really notices."


geezzz, i hope "they" don't!
my friend mick calls me a "silly sausage."
he's right! s
" I like not only to be loved, but also
to be told that I am loved.
I am not sure you are of the same kind, but
the realm of silence is large enough beyond the grave.
this is the world of literature and speech and
I shall take leave to tell you that you are very dear."


George Eliot
go to www.steelerbaby.com


kinda creepy but hey...!!!!

got this in an e-mail. s
" I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters."

Frank Lloyd Wright


this says so much on so many subjects.pick a topic and think about it for a moment or two. s

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

i thought i'd get back to some poetry work here.

i submitted a small poem to my poetry workgroup
the PK list. i've written about them before.
the poem,
in the body of an e-mail goes out to every poet
that is
a member of the list and can be commented on
and/or critiqued
by any or all. i will post the original and
the critiques,
then the rewrite of my poem.
it will give some idea of how
the process goes. we are free to
take any suggestions we please
or none at all. it is after all, our own work. s


this is the original


i would, i might

still, if i could
crawl into that bottle
like my father and his
before him
curling up in amber dreams
forgetting each and every til
breath is stilled.
keeping my own council when
judgment prods explanations.
days flowing unnoticed
into meaningless nights
i might.


these are the critiques,

sherry, generally works well, a couple of
thoughts.

forgetting each and every til (consider every ill/until breath is stilled)
breath is stilled.
keeping my own council when
judgment prods explanations.
days flowing unnoticed
into meaningless nights
i might.

(with stilled later, maybe, no still at start.)

capital I. maybe my only pet peeve,
subordinating ego in a poem.

me, here, my friend dislikes my disregard of capitals,
especially i's.


2 other e-mailed suggestions to "cork" the "ings" yep,
too many, they are right on that!

and then there were a few that liked the work as it was.
so, i mulled it over, moved things round and changed some things.
this is the rewrite and the version i reposted. it looks similar, but
in poetry especially, a word or two, an "ing" or not
can really make a difference. i've know poets, and i HAVE myself
gone crazy and lost sleep
over one freaking word in a poem.


i would, i might


if i could, crawl into that bottle
like my father and his
before him
just curled up in amber dreams
forgetting each and every
until breath is stilled
keeping my own council
when judgment prods explanations.
days flowing unnoticed
into meaningless nights
i might.



me, now, i think this is a finished work, but... s


Monday, January 16, 2006

i've been at those blog tests again!

seems if i were to attend a college i should major in

philosophy, music, theology, art, history or a foreign language

(i'll give them the philosophy even theology and definitely art
but no to studying music or a foreign language, i haven't the ear
for either. )

BUT

the funniest/oddest

was the test on who you were in a past life
(i'm still shaking my head over this one)


according to blog things i was, TAH DAH

a red headed viking living in the ukraine
that died in childbirth!!!!

(i'll take that to mean i was still a female, ho ho! )

Sunday, January 15, 2006

happy birthday Dr. KING.

a good site to visit is www.Tolerance.org


my grandparents on my mother's side were italian americans.
my grandfather came to this country when he was 15, all alone.
he spent a year on the railroad and 50 in a steel mill. he and my
grandmother raised 4 fine children, 2 spent time in the service, one
in world war 2 as a navigator on a bomber. my grandfather was so
proud of becoming a citizen. he knew far more of this county's
history than i did and we made trips as a family to washington d.c.
mt. vernon and monticello, gettysburg and other historical places
because my grandfather wanted to see them, walk them, absorb them.
when he passed away in his mid 80's the whole town, it seemed,
turned out. everyone had stories to tell me of things that
my grandfather did for them over the years. things i never knew about,
kindnesses big and small that he never mentioned because they
were just the right things to do, a kindness is done for the sake of kindness
not for future gain or to keep score. my grandfather was an amazing
person.

the point, well, my grandparents moved from the small town they
had settled in to the next town up the road, considered a more affluent one
trying to make a nicer home for their small children. they were
one of the first few italians to move there and the people that
owned the home next to the one they bought had 7 locks installed
on their big wooden front door and slept with a gun by the bed.
the wops were next door you understand. they were "moving on up!"

how do i know this? because that lady and her husband and my grandparents
became good friends over the years and they told my grandparents
of the fears and false impressions, the prejudices they had.
i wonder tho, did getting to know my grandparents show this couple
(who were older than my grandparents by a good deal) that some things
they believed, that prejudices weren't right or did they think that well,
"that family of wops" was alright, the exception to the rule?

i will never know. my grandfather didn't say much about such things. he went
about the business of living and ended up teaching by example.
i miss him. he taught me to take people as they come, as individuals. i hope
i make him proud, i know he still watches over me.

so, happy birthday Dr. King
i think you were a fine man too.
THEY WON!
just a note. i put on a radio station by random pick, happy accident!

i heard a song i haven't heard in ages, but oh god, i love it, always makes me melt.

ANGEL EYES by the Jeff Healey band

i wonder what ever happened to them? anyway a thank you to them
from this little smiling lady!
sunday, go steelers!!!!!!

Saturday, January 14, 2006

drip grind


a grey dawn translucent
silent not even a tummy rumble
bare feet cold on chilled tile
both hands wrapped around my
chipped white cup

i stare into it
down past the rising steam that
heats my face, so close to the edges i bow

looking for the answers to last night
a caffeine crystal ball
my drip grind oracle
Delphi in my kitchen
"It's not getting any smarter out there. You have to come to terms
with stupidity, and make it work for you." Frank Zappa"



i think some people have figured that out and we are the worse for it,
if what i've read of some trying to "swiftboat" Murtha is true. even his critics
in Washington agree that he is a true hero and patriot even tho
they disagree with his stance now. if this "swiftboating" is true,
then none of us
not even the best of us,
let alone, the rest of us will be safe from lies and
character assassination. so sad, this is our country, all of us. s



on a lighter note, perhaps, i've often commented on the fact that,
to me
Frank Zappa looked remarkably like the facial image
on the shroud of Turin.
no offense, Jesus had to look like somebody
and it struck me after they used a computer to recreate
the face(real or hoax, i'm not expert enough to even guess)
i always thought that Zappa was a genius in his way ,but
picked odd names for his kids. his kids, his call, but...

Friday, January 13, 2006

beloved
a
small word , your word






only a word
just one word out of
how many?

beloved
so small
but filled with

other words
and such things

tender, yet
fierce


beloved, a leading to word
full of surrender
and victory

heated meetings
bittersweet goings
beloved
your word

a small word.
" Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the
people with whom fate brings you together, but
do so with all your heart." Marcus Aurelius



" He who is in love is wise and is becoming wiser,
sees newly every time he looks at the object beloved, drawing from it
with his eyes and his mind those virtues which it possesses."

Ralph Waldo Emerson

a few quotes for the weekend.


"A conservative government is an organized hypocrisy."

Benjamin Disraeli



"Good people do not need laws to tell them to
act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws."

Plato


"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and
I'm not too sure about the former."

Albert Einstein
happy friday the 13th! s
why did the chicken cross the road????

BECAUSE IT WAS, "one small step for chickenkind, one giant leap for poultry."

neil armstrong

Thursday, January 12, 2006

i made it to another birthday, still surprises me.
i was so very sure i'd never make it to 20,
let alone the age i am today.
my beloved grandfather would smile at me and say
(with much love and a bit of pride i think) that i
was like those little italian donkeys that were common
in his little hometown in italy. said i was too stubborn
to give up.
yeah, thankfully, he was right. s

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

i was playing around with those addictive blog tests again.
they asked my birth month, which i thought spooky
given my birthday is tomorrow. so, anyway, it said
i am
"a natural leader who is able to stand up when

no one else can. strong and powerful you overshadow those around you."

your soul reflects deep love, fascination with life
and a distinctive persona

my colors are black, red, and dark blue.

well, the leader bit and the strong and powerful, that's not really true, but then, perhaps that is what i might have been if the nurture part of the nature/nurture debate was not so traumatic. strong? yeah, i had to be.

the soul part, yes, i'd like to think so.

the colors part, right on! that's spooky too! (and my 2006 car, a bentley azure, ho, ho!!!)

and i am going to need intensive therapy if i don't stop it with these blog tests!!!!
"the age of a woman doesn't mean a thing. The best tunes

are played on the oldest fiddles." Ralph Waldo Emerson


i'm not saying one word! s


but i'm thinking ....!!!!
tomorrow is my birthday. i am still surprised to be here. i really am. s
an update on bob.

he's been to the vet. he's a whopping 3 and 1/2 lbs.
twice his size, i swear, since he first came home with me!
he's been to the vet's, had ear mites (i thought so)
she put medicine in and hooray, no more scratching!
his markings are changing. he is sort of a
cream/white colored siamese with extremely light blue eyes
and grey markings with a hint of red in there, sort of
like some huskies are marked. he has faint horizontal
stripes in the dark of his lower legs and tail. looks like
a little bobcat!
he has full run of the place now and is quite
the ferocious little bug killer!
he purrs now and likes to be petted, follows me
around and generally comes when called.
i say, generally, he is a cat after all! s


talking to myself


i wanted to talk to you
tell you first
wanted to see my emotions
reflected in your eyes
i thought about
how your mouth would move
a tiny upward tug at first
then a wide smile
like a child opening his arms and spinning

i hoped you'd hold me
close into you
hard enough to make me wince
but in a good way
our way.

i wanted to talk to you first
tell you every little detail
but there's an empty place
where you used to be, and so

i told myself all about it
and waited impatient
for a reply.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

phobias are a bitch, female to be sure, but depression
is as churchill called his, "my black dog."
and those dogs i know, are male with big fucking balls! mine
may have a grey muzzle by now but his teeth are still sharp.


(yes, the f word, the ONLY word that fits)



my panic


starts as a moth
shredding fragile wings
as it tries to free itself
from the prison bars
of rib bone and muscle
the vibration of it's terror
runs like electricity
down goosefleshed arms
to numbed fingertips
shocks my eyes wide
breath catches between
in and out
the current runs down
through bowels, legs
soles, stiffened toes dig into
my shoes.
needing to run hide, instead
i curl into a ball that's
caught
in an adrenalin rush to nowhere.

well, the new blogging venture i'm in is up and running.
the first topic for discussion is music and memories, feelings etc.
it promises to be an interesting mix and i hope if anyone
has the time, they will check it out and leave their thoughts.
should be interesting. the 5 of us are pretty different in many ways
so i'm looking forward to this. www.thesoulofus.blogspot.com


thanks much. sherry

Monday, January 09, 2006

i'm just really REALLY excited!

IT'S ALIVE, on WBGN-TV is going to run

BRIDE OF THE MONSTER this sat. night at 10 p.m.

oh the joy, i'm all a twitter here!
(o.k. i know get the shovel, it's getting deep here...!)

but hey,
it is a true epic in the giggledom of bad films!

i'm telling you, it's really not to be missed!
you'll kick yourself if you pass this up.
at least, put a tape in!

my job is done now,
go, go and wallow in the cheesy goodness! s
the old section

the stones look soft
the inscriptions
remind me of a finger drawn
through dry sand
filling back in as my hand moves on
nothing sharp here
not even grief
a gentle sleep of
the long dead.
head on over to

www.sporkinthedrawer.blogspot.com

and read the post ANNOYED

it's really something else! i was floored.



i wanna hold your hand
with much love to THE BEATLES



ah they were on to something
i wanna hold your hand
my body was in it's becoming stage
when those boys seemed

to be singing in black and white
wanting to hold my hand

and now ah now
i wanna hold your hand


trace contours with a fingertip
study each nail every knuckle
a gentle squeeze
as i raise it to kiss

i wanna hold your hand
i can almost feel the warmth of your flesh
on moist lips your pulse beating
in your wrist as i touch the tip of my tongue
there

oh those lads from liverpool
they knew.



Saturday, January 07, 2006

i've just gotten an e-mail from a friend, a member of my poetry workshop and a wonderful poet and editor. chris george.

he has sent the website for a tribute and poetry of barbara ostrander.
barbara was a fellow poet and pk member. she was also a caring and wonderful friend and an extraordinary
human being. her life was a novel in itself, her poetry was gifted. she passed on last year. she spent a lot of time in africa and all over the world doing amazing things for people. i miss her and her words.

you will become entranced i think by reading of her life and reading a few of her poems. i promise you. thanks, sherry

http://www.synapse.net/kgerken/Y-0601.HTM
a typical friday nite



sitting at one corner of the bar
closest to the door
always close to the door

thoughts of escape
curiosity or just
easier to observe


the shy looks sly looks
the bold looks

i see lives from that spot
friday nite lives
a bit different
than the rest of the week

hungrier happier
a frantic quality to get on
with it get it started
whatever it may be

a booze assisted forgetting
or finding or fucking
an alcohol excuse for, IT

life as seen from the corner stool
by a door that promises answers.


hello again.

i'm starting into a new adventure with a few friends i've met through my own blog here.

it's called THE SOUL OF US and it is up, but we are working right now on the first posts. there are 5 of us, very different in backgrounds and opinions so it should be interesting. we will be posting on different topics and i hope people will join in with their own thoughts or memories on the ideas we come up with. it's at

www.thesoulofus.blogspot.com

since we 5 are so different in many ways yet united in a deep respect for others and a search for learning and understanding the differences in all , plus having a good humor for most things it should be interesting. at least, i hope so.

me, i will still have my blog here which is my first love, and my on line blogs here that i so enjoy and comment on. i've come to really look forward to checking in on them every day and seeing how things are going, in the news and with them as they are varied and interesting people. thanks, s.

Friday, January 06, 2006

Thursday, January 05, 2006

" if you're going to walk on thin ice, you might as well dance."

anonymous





gonna boogie oggie oggie til i just can't boogie no more...

a song lyric that just won't stop playing in my head! not sure of the group, fits tho! s
we bleed

we bleed well and often
you know that's just
the way it is.
it's hard for a woman not to

we do it so well
and with such feeling

from first flow to
that first time
in childbirth or
with broken hearts

we bleed.
january



a midnight snow
in silver light
feather soft snowflakes






drift down in cold
weighted silence






hides the sleepers
the promise of colors
yet to be.

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

sad, today, such sad news. i hope the focus tho, does not linger on the awful miscommunication and instead finds the reasons behind this terrible accident. s

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

been taking those addictive blog tests again help, geezzz!

anyway, says i was an artsy kid in high school (well, yeah, quietly artsy in the school, more outside of it's walls!)

and as to the "how weird?" quiz,
i'm 50 percent weird.

"normal enough to know i'm weird...
BUT too damn weird to do anything about it."

true enough, BUT, who said i wanted to change now??? s
a prayer for the miners

may there be air pockets and angels and luck.
packed bar


30 or so people
sitting around the oval shaped bar
some talking
some listening
a few, eavesdropping
looking for that random booze slip
of the lip
that juicy little snack they can share
later at home or the grocery store
or another bar.

30 or so people at the bar
some laughing
some crying in their beer
a few, horny
looking for that meaningless drunken
stroll out to the parking lot
or the motel down the block.

30 or so people at the bar
some angry
some really pissed off
one, daring to hope
looking for the door to open
and someone special to...


hope can be found anywhere

Monday, January 02, 2006

looking now and then

i search the curves of my soul
trying to find the words
fingertips strain reaching out
they brush against my own heart
touch leaving slight
indentations faint bruises
the effort brings the words
and the tears.

Sunday, January 01, 2006

hi there, just sat down, had a toasted bagel and some hot tea, some tylenol and i'm doing o.k! actually, i was up early, got the laundry started(the sheets smelled ,like a left over new year's eve !)

i danced WAY too much( i can't do any organized steps but i can fast dance still!)
i drank too much for me, but i stopped hours before i had to drive home (i am the designated driver almost always unless there is ice or snow, then i am absolutely useless as i panic at the first few flakes)i ate cheesecake and brownies( when in doubt, eat dessert first, my motto!)

for years now, been going to this little club for new year's eve. every midnight, i stop for a few seconds among all the kisses and hugs and noise and wish a happy new year to those i am not with and those that need a good year the most.

so far, every year has been as the last, some good, more bad, but still, livable.
perhaps, this will be the year when joy comes knocking on many doors, maybe even mine. blessings on you and yours. s