I don't think these photographs you've taken do me justice. You don't want justice - you want mercy!
What steps would you take if a madman came rushing at you with a knife?
Great big ones!
Who was the world's greatest thief?
Atlas, because he held up the whole world!
How was the Roman Empire cut in half?
With a pair of Caesars!
If two's company and three a crowd, what are four and five?
What is it that even the most careful person overlooks?
Mr Smith: I hate to tell you, but your wife just fell down the wishing well.
Mr Brown: It works!