got back from the hospital a bit ago. it's nearing the end for my brother in law.

you can call me any name you like-you can believe down to your tippy toes that i'll burn in your hell but FUCK- assisted suicide should be allowed-hell- it should be a RIGHT!!!!

i have been thru many deaths. some, like my grandfather's and my uncle's and my father's- really horrible but i have never seen the suffering of anyone like i have now-it's cruel and it's evil to let a human being suffer as he is and i know- he isn't the only one going thru this ordeal-somewhere-someplace!

this is pathetic! and for what? he only has a few days to a week and yet with all the morphine and oxy and whatever else-he STILL moans out or screams in pain, especially if you have to move him even to reposition his head on the pilliow. the cancer is in his BONES now for pity's sake-WTF??!!

even a few of the aides cry with him.

we treat animals better- don't DARE give me crap about it's god's will-god will decide- fuck. that's why we have morphine!

he said today that he "doesn't know how to die!" he said he "wants to go!"

do you have any idea what that does to his family? tommy's a good guy. i've known him since he was just a kid-15 years old. i was there when he finally passed his driving test-when he and his girl(now his wife) went to the prom.

sucks!